Another of my masterpieces.
A sort of fictionalized take on my parodying the Phil Collins album Hits.
What to get myself now,
the Black Pearl Crew asked among themselves, knowing their employer would want Jack to be at it again.
For the moment they were on a somewhat clean island, which looked well kept up and not at all inclined to hand much to a pirate. That island represented The Cars, a band familiar to Buccaneer Blue and her friends, but which an anachronism-filled troublemaker named Jack Spasm would probably find more relevant than the Crew, given all the modern things in the songs.
When no parody album of The Cars was created, the Crew roamed the landscape of the Caribbean, considering another suggested artist by the audience: Blondie. Attention had more specifically been given to the song by them, Tide is High, which fit the Caribbean musically and had the mention of the tide. . . while, as it turned out, falling down on actually allowing Jack to tell a story, so repetitive that song was.
Well, the audience had tried, but now it was back to the expert.
After taking care to not be like Jack Spasm and fall into the aforementioned traps, Jack waited a few days, until he got a recommendation from his employer. The works of Phil Collins would be easier to sail through. Investigation commenced.
One song Blue chose to hand the smart crew was Easy Lover. Given its being about one who would take your heart without you feeling it, there would not be much of a wait to figure out what this song was going to be parodied about. A good thing, because when any song did present that much difficulty, it was seldom considered with it.
Also bearing similarities to once-grand sailors who had been fused with octopuses and now wanted Jack to be done for was Something Happened on the Way to Heaven. It musically had a bit of a Caribbean vibe, but as was well known by now, more was needed to cement it for the Crew. That more, it had - being about a troubled relationship, it was like the silhouette of the story of Davy Jones and Calypso.
The Crew could see themselves in Dance Into the Light. Freedom, no more chains to hold you, holding the key. . . Will had to ask what it meant, saying the train would come to carry you home, but he knew the rest of what was upon them. He let out an ah
at the lines about freedom. Work was fast, few questions had to be asked, all was coming together for Jack Sparrow.
Attention was drawn to I Wish It Would Rain Down, because its subject was a bad relationship. It said plenty of things Jack Spasm would have wasted, but that the real Jack would keep it all, knowing the role it could serve in describing Calypso’s former lover.
She who had had the bad relationship came to mind again. This one song said I’ve been a prisoner all my life.
There were the semblances of a certain story in that line, as well as in much not being remembered, thereby providing another amusing way to retell about Davy and Calypso. Not tell by a serious mouth, but that was the point.
Accustomed to subsisting on lines about longing for someone, or their standing in your heart being significant, Jack (Sparrow, not Spasm, we repeat) said Two Hearts was worth looking into.
One song said You can’t hurry love.
It was about someone who wanted love, but found he had to wait. In what might seem like a ridiculous statement to the critics, he said he was hoping for a love to let him live again.
The method of doing parody albums was not set in stone, as evidenced by what happened when all was said and done with Phil Collins. Nobody was ignoring Collins, as he had helped everyone remember some things, but it was proposed that the time of whole albums of parodies might be over. After all, they got started by a lot who deserved no trust, who decided what to do next based on arbitrary connections - and the course for the imaginary vessel to follow should be anything but arbitrary. Nobody could see a definite next album, but nor could they deny that Jack could fit into some individual songs by The Cars, just not very many. Word also got out from Buccaneer Blue that an individual she knew and loved from Green Day had just put out a solo single about roaming the Caribbean, the Bahamas, and their locales in search of some woman.
Spoiler: It might not be an album, but a means of going to the swampland in a song is sure to be found.
A new way to use an album will be discovered - but at what cost?